June 10, 2004

Many people think that being a booker is a glamorous job. You set your own hours, hang out with bands and spend a lot of time in bars (hey, that does sound great). The only problem is that while you are hanging out with bands and spending time in bars, you are also stressed out about the current show and the next three you have booked (or almost booked).

Then there's the constant headache of fliers -- getting them made, getting them on the street and in the stores, handing them out wherever you go. I always carry a bag with me when I leave the house. Friends and acquaintances have become accustomed to my greeting them with an outstretched hand, not to shake, but to give them a handbill.

Ah yes, and email. A day without checking email can be disastrous. It could lead to a missed opportunity -- or a cancellation. Nothing's worse than having to book the same date more than once because one band has a sick drummer and the other one has a guitarist that just got switched to night shift.

There are times when you are not dealing with booking and promotions, but you suddenly have to anyway. For example: You are being intimate with your girlfriend ... the lights are out, you are snuggling up, and all of a sudden you bolt upright and say out loud, "Thursday's Child would be a perfect headliner for that Flesh Orgy show!" Women are definitely turned on by this.

Okay, it's not all that bad. In fact it's kinda good. Making fliers can be stressful, but can be fun as well. Then there's hanging out in bars. I can't say that it sucks to watch a show you booked with a free drink in your hand (your sixth of the night).

One of the first lessons I learned when I started booking was that the philosophy, "Build it, they will come" is definitely not true. I have watched, practically alone, some really great bands I booked. I remember one time watching Kid 606 with my doorguy and two of Kid 606's friends in the audience (both on the guestlist). I fliered for the show. I told everyone I knew. Unfortunately, everyone I knew did not give a flying fuck about Kid 606. It would have helped if Kid 606 would have told more of his friends. Sometimes performers are under the assumption that bookers and promoters will take care of all the promotion. Three lessons I have learned: It is best to book bands that appeal to a scene you are at least somewhat connected to; you can never count on anyone; and you must always prepare for the worst.

Remember that a positive attitude can go a long way. I have worked in shitty venues, places where the management didn't give a damn about live music. At a bar in the Tenderloin where I was once a booker, given a choice between having a reputable artist perform where the bar did $500, and having a donkey show involving midgets where the bar did $600, they would have chosen the donkey show.

There were other things that kept bands from wanting to play this venue -- carrying gear up a dark stairway, and nightly noise complaints that meant bands would have to cut their sets short or not even play. I had to do my best to make it a fun place -- sneaking extra drink tickets, having a good attitude and being as positive as I could muster. I'd have lax booking policies. If I could "lure" a headliner to play, I would give them the option of choosing the other bands on the bill. They'd have more fun if some of their friends were there with them on stage, if not in the audience. I would be very honest about payment, showing the bands the numbers. On the nights I bartended, I'd give touring bands unlimited free swill (don't tell my ex-boss). It's better than nothing.

When booking bands, book what you like. It's kind of like picking up girls or guys. Go to a place where you know the band you like will be. Wear something sexy (optional). Introduce yourself. Tell them your purpose. Exchange digits. Do not come on too strong. Repeat these steps until you have contact info for a few bands. It helps if some of the bandmembers owe you favors or if you know a dark secret or two about their pasts.

Bands -- to find a venue, befriend a booker/promoter. We can be territorial at times, but most of us don't bite. Make sure you have an enticing lineup. Ask the booker if they'd be interested in letting you put on the show at their venue, or offer to co-promote the show with them. Also, meeting club owners can help. Make your presence known to the music community.

Matt Shapiro (crackwhorepresents@yahoo.com) books around town at various venues, including the Elbo Room. He also books Lucifer's Hammer, the weekly metal showcase at the Cat Club (www.unholycadaver.com/). He has probably given you a flier at least once.